Only One

Today starts a series I’m calling Only One.  I’ve asked a few people to answer the question, “If I could only write One Letter to someone, who would it be and why?

I knew it’s be interesting…I wasn’t prepared for how powerful reading each answer would be. Just amazing…

Jenny Floria, media strategist, fundraising fanatic, blogger, mom to two growing girls.  Our daughters are BFF’s. Sit back & soak in the words that Jenny shares with us…

If I could only write one letter to someone I was grateful for, I would have to write it to my sister.

My sister and I obviously grew up in the same family. I say “obviously,” but it would NOT be obvious to others who didn’t know, outside of our eyes. Our matching eyes always give us away.

We are completely the opposite of each other. We jokingly wonder if the other was secretly adopted.

I am an extrovert. She likes her alone time. I have a family. She and her husband kept their family to the four-legged kind. I value physical fitness and love a good long inline skate. She prefers her computer games. She has struggled with her weight, something I’ve never even thought about most of my life.

But more than anything, she lacks that inner voice that tells her she means something to those around her and that she adds value to the world.

My sister has battled depression since her early 20’s. Not just “I feel like crap today,” but tough, debilitating thoughts that kept her from going to work at one point in time and nearly had her convinced to end her life.

The part that sucks about depression is that the same voice that tells a person she isn’t worth taking up space on this planet also convinces her that everyone else thinks that about her too, and that it’s normal to feel this miserable.

I thank God every day that my sister listened to the tiny little voice of logic in her head which was screaming through the fog, “This isn’t right! Go get help!” before she followed through on the plans in her brain.

She nearly killed herself the year my second child was born, but held off because she didn’t want me to associate the birth of my youngest with her departure from this earth. To this day I wonder if she would still be with us if I hadn’t been pregnant at that time of her life.

The scariest part to me is that none of us had any idea. Not her husband, not our parents, her friends, not me.

My girls cannot imagine life without their aunt in it.  Neither can I.

She is loving. Fun. Caring. Generous. Despite living hundreds of miles away, she sees her nieces several times a year when she travels to our home. She changed their diapers, cared for them when they were sick, and takes them on endless outings to zoos, theatres, museums and all kinds of places. I cannot imagine how exhausting our lives must seem compared to someone who doesn’t have kids, yet she can’t wait to be a part of their activities.

So if I ever weren’t around, I would want my sister to have physical proof in the form of a letter from me, telling her that she is loved. She is filled with joy. She is kind and sweet and all those things you could ever want in a best friend.

My letter would be that voice for her.

You can follow Jenny on her blog The Jenny Life & Twitter @JennyFloria